Waiting

Just waiting. I dunno what for. I’m just waiting. Life is so dull these days. I feel bored and it’s as if I’m waiting. Maybe I’m waiting for time to just pass. For me to graduate and leave the hellhole that is NP and start anew. It’s a very boring and long wait though…

Started reading manga again for the heck of it. Specifically I’m continuing the Tsubasa Chronicles series. Doubt I’ll continue with the other shonen junk. Tsubasa has this surreal fantasy to it that I just love, it’s very similar to Kingdom Hearts by Disney/Square Enix.

Other than that it’s the usual school, projects, WoW and watching my tv series. America’s Next Top Model and Project Runway are ending soon. My remaining tv competition series left would be Survivor Samoa, where they just got to the merge. This is my first time watching Top Model and Runway, and I must say, while I have close to zero interest in modelling (LOL) and fashion, both shows have been entertaining to me. It’s actually pretty good, have me some insights to the modelling and fashion world. I’m not happy they sent Christopher home in Project Runway. Irina’s a total bitch but I actually like her work and she should totally win it this season.

Also, thank you WoW community for telling me why Paris Hilton is immune to zombies. Sometimes it’s good if you lack brains.

Horde

Just pseudo-school related, my lifestyle’s been changing and will be changing more. I now have to stop spending my free time on WoW much and actually have to go to the gym for my Physical Fitness module. Still pretty lazy to do that, probably after Napha practical. Meh.

Speaking of WoW, I’ve already changed my faction and am now part of the Horde =D Alliance were the embodiment of failures unless like me, you played a Dwarf, the only respectable race of the Alliance. Alliance is just full of wimpy idiots. Seriously lvl80s having to ask me the concept of gemming. I don’t care if we’re friends of strangers, there are LOTS of sites to help you. You might say that Horde players are mean cos they don’t help anyone at all, which isnt true at all. Horde help one another buy being skilled. Horde don’t teach. You just fucking LEARN from sites.

Kudos to failure WoW players that have gold problems. You people suck. I’m not gonna apologize to being a very rich WoW player (have -every- expensive gold mounts in the game + Dalaran ring). I don’t farm but just quest, do dailies and actually play with the Gem market so shut up, I deserve to brag. Here comes the “It’s just a game” comments, even if it’s just a game it’s still an MMO so you have different players with different level of interest in the game. If your way of enjoying yourself is to suck at this game then you shouldn’t be interacting with people, be it dungeons or chat.

You should mind the fact that when you interact with people, there has to be standards. Horde just has this standards (at least on Nagrand server). As Horde now I can actually raid with a competent guild (clearing ToC raids in 1 night, both 10 AND 25, on the same night) and don’t have to worry about bads making me unhappy.

Alliance side, apparantly being ‘casual’ means you can get into raids undergeared, without knwledge of fights and with ungemmed/unenchanted gear. That’s not what we call a casual, that’s what we call a “bad” or a “scrub”. Also I find that restricting your interaction in WoW to just Singaporeans is fail. If it weren’t for my New Zealand and Aussie friends I probably would have actually quit WoW. -EVERY- SGean player I’ve met in WoW with the exception of 1 or 2 are just airheads that only want to stick to other SGean friends because they’re too fucking scared to be competent. And they think they’re bigshots when they take 2-3 nights to clear current raid content and do 2k DPS. The lowest DPSer in my raid now is 4k and more than half are in te 5k-6k range.

It’s not the gear. You’re just bad. I’m not the best Priest in game but at least I know I genuinely put in effort in my toon. I read up on upcoming changes (not just what is my class about) and get involve with the player community. Socializing is important. Heck, it’s my friend that lives in New Zealand that was the one that paid for my transfer. Her account was expiring anyway and she just offered to transfer my toon in exchange of buying  gamecard for her.

I think I’ve also covered this in an earlier post that I do enjoy making friends with ppl from all over the world. Keeps my mind open by communicating and talking to people from all walks of life and not just SGeans. I absolutely value the aspect of going global (but not snooze-fest politics =P).

Well the past is the past. I’m a Horde Troll Priest now. A faction that bands and bonds over competency and self-effort instead of spoonfeeding information to the lost cause and I enjoy that. The population is smaller than the Alliance, but it only means we’re more close-knitted. The true Alliance dorks might think Horde is harsh and are a bunch of elitist jerks who doesn’t care about the newbies, But hey, you Alliance claim you’re more helpful with one another, yet the general populace is just sad and pathetic. There’s a HUGE gap of skill level between the Alliance commoners and the top end Alliance guild as compared to the Horde’s. Whatever….<_<

Oh and completely unrelated to WoW but LOST Season 5 DVD will be out in December, yay~!

Falling Mood

Week started off well, but then it went downhill. Hit rock bottom just now. I seriously have no idea why. I just, really wasn’t in the mood. I thought that it’s the last semester of Poly and I should just breeze through it, but it’s harder than I thought. It is because it is the final semester that my hatred towards this shitty course is at its peak.

A lot of lame and useless modules this semester. The ONLY module that is remotely interesting is World Issues. Simply because it has no relation to IT/Engineering, but the lecturer is cool too so the lesson is just way more enjoyable.

I am absolutely disgusted at my Poly life now. Few days back was thinking that maybe I should really go pay $70 for the Graduation Party/Night.  Now that I think about it, I’m not going to. There is nothing to celebrate about. I am very disappointed for 3 years and it is a total good riddance to NP School of Fail Engineering. Other classmates want to be proud of the course and shit they can go ahead. Once I graduate, sif I care about what happened in 3 years. It’s a past I’ll put behind and forget. No shitty things like sweet memories. Just good freaking riddance.

I am NOT happy with Enginering Informatics. Half the lecturers couldn’t even speak English properly. Even the students. Like seriously, I don’t mean I speak awesomely perfect English. But I do keep it decent and try my best. But to use Singlish EVERYTIME, or worse yet, not able to speak it in English but able to say it in useless Malay or Chinese, that’s just stupid.

I’m not gonna put flowers around my words anymore to make it pretty. A lot of Engineering students are just dumb narrow-minded shitholes that only know how to talk in USELESS Hokkien or whatever your fail Mother Tongue is. “Outcast” me if you want, as if I care or feel hurt about being outcasted by a group of kids that can’t even spell “Outcast”.

All you guys only do is organize stupid events (heard you even have like some society for it, how stupid) for “Fun Games Day” or whatever crap. Go ahead and think I’m arrogant, heck, I encourage it. That way you’ll get wary of me and I can see your pathetic attempts at dissing me with your “powderful Engrish”, further proving my point. There’s a reason why the media world is so glam and rich. They’re socially more intelligent. Who the fuck cares if it’s superficial. I enjoy it. Beats you sorry Engineering dumbos and your useless games days.

LOL Even Engineering school is at the back of Poly and are just a couple of rundown buildings.

—

Oh yeah on Wednesday’s World Issues lesson, there was an activity where the lecturer flashed two words and the class have to either move to the right or left to take their stand. One pair of words was “Gay or Straight”. Except for a couple of the lowlifes I mentioned above that were too lazy to move, I was the only real one that took a stand for the Gays (you’re welcome ^_^) while everyone else went Straight. It’s a shame that a lot of SGeans are still stupid and narrow-minded. There is NO difference between homophobia and racism. They’re both wrong in this age and day. This is also why I’m hardly proud of my country. In USA lots of states are legalizing same-sex marriage, but gay issues hardly arise in Singapore because of the narrow-minded and lack of intelligence Sgeans have.

LOL @ 1 comment during the lesson that says: If Singapore allowed same-sex marriage, population will decline because cant make babies. Like wtf, SG legalize gay marriage and everyone turns gay?? And what’s preventing the LGBT community in SG to not marry and make babies even if it’s not legalize??

Really, if there are any Singaporeans reading this, I CHALLENGE and DARE you do make an INTELLIGENT comment saying why homosexuality is wrong or why shouldn’t SG legalize same sex marriage. Be assured every reason possible that you give will be countered because it’s really just stupid to prevent homosexuality. There is no such thing as a good reason to not allow same-sex marriage.

Long Night After A Long Week

I’ll start off with this week’s episode of Glee. <3 Puck’s (played by Mark Salling) cover of “Sweet Caroline”. Seriously he has a better voice than the male lead.

First week of classes is over. Thoughts? Same old, same old. Just a slightly newer class mix. Gotta finish up some homework by tomorrow night and that’s it.

Oh and Physical Fitness Management, I know it’s kinda my fault for choosing it but I just have to whine. So lazy, they making me go gym. Highly likely I’ll just skip this first week’s session and say I forget. Give me time to settle down and adjust please. This is like a mini ‘culture shock’ for me. Ask me media stuff and I’m game.

I’m no where near professional performer. I’m not. But hell I’m exposed to to it way more than sporty shit. Well I’m sorry but in case you’re narrow-minded, there are many paths in life. And by exposure I don’t mean watching tv.

Walking down memory lane a bit during my early childhood days in Nursery/Kindergarten I do remember roleplaying a lot in class. Primary school…oh LOL! I was a little boy Scout but only for a year because I lost interest. Then I was just part of the…I dunno what actually. I remember being participating in random stage events from story telling (or was it a freakin’ debate XD) to group dance performances.

Oooh, just remembered! My group came in 3rd in some competition to dance and rap to a song promoting No Smoking. Smoking is bad, mmkay?? See we’re taught that since Pri schl. Shame on you smokers too pathetic to quit. Oh and here’s another thing if you hate me and want to make fun of me, I was a cheerleader for my Red House in Primary School wakakakakaka~! XD Eh, but, no pompoms lar I swear. Guy part of cheerleading is just embarrassing dance routines.

…

…

On second thought, I will never talk about it. No, don’t bring it up.

…

Hmm, you know I’ve had this New Post pge open since 730pm. Got distracted by songs and msn. Like random only. Post started about Glee, went on to school and me whining about gym and how the fuck is it relating to my Primary school stuff LOL.

If anything at least I know where my passion for the performance media ignited. Lost my way in sec schl when I went into the Engineering/IT path with my ccas. Only had 1 or 2 stupid class performances when I was in lower sec, doing some Chinese New Year thing cos my teacher was from China and he was in charge of the celebration that year.

Poly? Just a notably short but memorable stint in DanceSports. Unfortunate I didn’t had a consistent partner, else I know I would probably still be in it. Realized I was pretty discouraged and unmotivated to continue back then.

There’s no questioning my passion and interest in the media world, be it tv or stage, behind or in front of camera. I just dunno where to go to get actual exposure and a platform to give me a chance and opportunity to start off. I don’t have any portfolios or any shit. I think the most logical step would be to enroll in a media school. But where the heck can I go with a shitty Engineering diploma??

++more hatred towards Engineering.

Useless shit.

And So It Begins…

School. This is it. The final semester. It’s a good start, though the class split-&-mix is very obvious. The old F03 and F04 are still like in their own group. Meh… doesn’t concern me at the moment. I have to focus on settling in to the new modules first.

Non-school related: YAY Ugly Betty is back for a new season!!! ^_^ That makes it a total of 13 tv series that I watch every week. 13 hours of shows LOL. And I honestly swear it’s way more than how much I probably play WoW. Ok maybe WoW just a bit more but only if I raid dungeons that week.

Now and then I bring back up my DS and continue playing Kingdom Hearts: 358/2 Days. Yeah, I actually bought it. I dunno why, but I just love slow complex stories like Kingdom Hearts. I still like the story concept of merging every Disney world into 1 single universe and added in flavors of Final Fantasy. It has an eerie resemblence to the manga/anime series Tsubasa Chronicles by CLAMP. Minus Disney/Final Fantasy and plus anime characters.

Oh yeah, CLICK HERE! I LOVE the new Lady Gaga song “Bad Romance”~!!! I also like 2 singles from Backstreet Boys’ new album but meh, cbf to link them. <3 Lady Gaga more.

Ok, on a more ’serious’ note, here’s a (possibly cryptic?) note to a certain someone:

You have honestly no idea how happy I am to see your life in ruins. I am a very sensitive, caring and loyal person and I swear I can be one of the best of friends anyone can have. But if you screw me over, disrupt my life, or just annoy the hel out of me, I’ll gladly get back at you. And it’s just hilarious that I don’t have to do a single thing except simply to wish that you’re gone. And then you really are gone.

I even found out that you screwed yourself even more in some way or another. Good for you. You can’t be responsible for yourself. Now you have to shoulder another responsibility. Your Mum must be proud. If you were my kid I would have disowned you. Some people just aren’t cut out to live life. It’s okay. Contrary to popular belief, suicide IS a viable option to solve problems. And seeing how you’re such a disappointment to everyone around you every single minute that you’re breathing, you’d do good to end your sorry excuse of a life.

Hugs, kisses, and good riddance.
xoxo, Qad. <3

The One Hundredth

My 100th post on Zero-Equanimity ^_^

Er… Grats? LOL.

Let’s delete and start a new blog =/ Mmm…nah, can’t be bothered. I still remember scrapping my old blog for this one because I pretty down in my life at that time, and rebooted blog as a parallel to restarting/renewing my life.

It’s the last week of holidays. Just enjoying all the Glee songs (I gotz da MP3 files yay), Backstreet Boys’s new album (lulz) and because of Glee’s awesome cover of “Keep Holding On”, listening to Avril Lavigne >.< Meh, I like Avril, she’s nothing like the girls right now, the whole Miley/Selena and whoever that other one is. Ah, Demi Levato (Lavato? Potato?).

Also rewatched a couple of movies like Star Trek & GI Joe. Can’t wait for the sequels for those two. Oh and also The Proposal. I just LOVE Ryan Reynolds the movie that just coincidentally starred Ryan Reynolds. Watchmen (Director’s Cut) is amazing too. I like superhero shows that portray them as almost normal troubled people instead of over-the-top crimefighters. That’s why I HATE crapfest like Superman, Batman and Spiderman. God, Spiderman is making 3 more films? First 3 were a total snoozefest. They weren’t as good as X-Men, where there is a much darker theme of prejudice, discrimination and racism.

Oh well, school starts next week, so Imma just slack through my last week of holidays and just storm through the final semester. I can’t, won’t and refuse to fail. Gonna just pass, get my diploma and off to NS. Still hate NS but I’ve made peace with it and will go through it.

Then let’s see what’s life after that =/ Wonder which media school accepts an Engineering student? T.T

More Glee =)!!!

Probably for me, this season’s unexpected number one show I’m enjoying right now is Glee. Musical comedy-drama series. They don’t do any original songs like High School Musical but they’re a gazillion times better. Whoever says that only the original artistes of a song can ever be the best at singing the song should totally watch Glee.

This week’s episode was a small competition between the guys and girls, each group having to do a mashup. You be the judge to which group did better:

Guys- “It’s My Life” by Bon Jovi + “Confessions Part Two” by Usher

Girls- “Halo” by Beyonce + “Walking on Sunshine” by Katrina and the Waves

Just go to Youtube if the vids don’t work anymore or if you want to see the actual dance footage on the tv show (better yet just go watch the series lol).

Oh and the tv premiere for this song will be next week, but the studio single is out already. Glee’s take on “Keep Holding On” by Avril Lavigne:

Go Global

SingNet and their fantastimazing upgrades of fiber optics crap. My internet connection has been nothing but horribad since they came to my house last Friday to upgrade.

Hari Raya season is going on but it’s been over for me for quite a while (thank goodness). So not into the celebration and visiting of people’s homes. I hate how they insist you to eat some heavy meals out of kind gesture. If we say we’ve eaten at some other house already, then it means we’re full. Insisting us to eat isn’t showing us you’re just being curteous as the house owners, it gets on people’s nerves.

Also it’s only my parents, specifically my Dad that actually does a lot of chat. I just sit down and kept quiet looking bored. My aunts/uncles, it’ always the same conversation when they interact with me LOL:

Them: “So what Year are you in now?”
Me: “Poly Year 3, final year”
Them: “When NS?”
Me: “Next year.”
Them: “Wah, know already what you getting? Army?”
Me: “Nope, not yet.”
Them: “Then?”
Me: “Dunno yet” (ffs I just said I dunno bfore…)
Them: “Oh, then what you hope to get?”
Me: “Dunno, Duncare. Cannot appeal or choose anyway.”
Them: “You know, Army overworks you.”
Me: “So I’ve heard…”
Them: “Police is quite worthwhile.”
Me: “Strangely Dad doesn’t want me there.”
Them: “Why not? Wasn’t he in the police force?”
Me: “Yeah, who knows. He wants me in Civil Defence.”
Them: “That’ cool too.”
Me: “I’m being forced to give up 2 years of my life to be a govt dog. Nothing cool about that.”
Them: “Hmm, true.”

The most annoying thing is my Dad actually once suggested I sign on after 2 years. Like, What. The. Fish.??!! I actually want to pursue a fulfilling life, get a job and immerse myself on a GLOBAL level. I don’t want and don’t plan to live in Singapore for the rest of my life. If I ever get a life partner, said partner is unlikely a Malay person. Actually I rather save up money to buy myself a house first then a marriage.

Because unlike typical nooblet young adults these days that head straight to boyfriend/girlfriend relationships, I actually want to define and make my own grounds in this world first. Which is why I hate my course btw, like wtf is Egineerin Informatics. And I wanna get into media because it’s the best walk of life to expose myself to the world.

Earth is HUGE. Why only make do with what I have in Singapore? There’s so much to life than just going out with your friends around the country doing typical shopping or whatever crap. I actually enjoy going global, and mind you I don’t mean going to cities like Hong Kong or Taiwan or whatever shit and only shopping. I enjoy immersing into different cultures and lives.

I guess, that’s just who I am as a person. You learn things about who you are and what defines you around this age, exiting teenagehood and entering into the group of people that contributes to society. Saying that I wanna make a difference to the world is unlikely and too grand for me LOL, but I do want to be a part of it and not just sit around Singapore with a dayjob.

Still thinking about using any income I’ll get from NS for some trip around the world. But I have no idea where I’ll end up after NS so who knows. It’s still a long time away and I would very much rather focus on finishing my diploma + NS (National Slavery) first. I like short term goals. Long term goals that I can only even remotely have a chance to pursue is too far off for me. Also, it’s not like I come from a rich and wealthy family clan (we’re well off, but not insanely rich) so there are still financial issues when I want to travel. My financial situation is simply sufficient now to live through day to day life, but no extras =/ I still haven’t paid a single cent for the laptop I’ve been using for Poly >.<

Alone in Glee

I LOVE this week’s episode of Glee! Guest starred Kristin Chenoweth and she’s just amazing~!

Below is her rendition of “Alone” in a duet with Matthew Morrison:

Probably the best rendition of “Alone” I’ve heard. She also lead sing “Last Name” which is pretty awesome too…

Last Semester’s IS

Last semester is coming. I’m in class 3F04 wtf. Way to go ruining my nice streak of being part of F03 since Year 1.

=(

I’m in the class doing RFID, supposedly the easier of the 2 electives, but we’ll see. Oh and my supervisor from IHP, yeah, I’ll STILL be seeing him for another semester, every single day, 2 hours a day. “-__- Mon-Tue he’ll be teaching me EAS and Thur-Fri for RFID. Only on Wednesdays will I not see him, but that’s cos Wed is IS.

And now IS. I have until this Wednesday 8am to choose what elective I wanna take. But Year 3 IS, they all freaking sucks. Ok, not suck completely, but all the choices are all lamer compared to Year 2.

On the top of my choice list is, or maybe now was, Understanding The Media. But the previews look like crap, and rather boring. Not sure if I wanna go for it anymore.

Then there’s Ethical Dilemmas. Debating about controversial stuff sounds way insanely cool, but the requirements… Saw that it’s 20% class participation, 40% vocal presentation and 40% written report. And have to work in groups. The last thing I need is to write reports as a group. Plus I ain’t so sure if it’s smart to be taking up an elective that requires so much focus to write reports etc in my final sem.

Some of my other choices I’m considering are:
-Effective Negotiation
-Effective People Management
-Human Communication
-Insight into the Tourism Industry
-Investing in the Stock Market
-Personal Fitness Management

…wait, wut?? Personal Fitness Management??? LOLOLOL Qadir. This is QADIR leh. Qadir who took 20 minutes to do his 2.4km run in Nafa test in Sec 4 cos he suck so badly that he only ran cos he play catching with his friends at the back while the actual more ’serious’ people put in effort to run/jog 2.4km. And that was in Sec 4 when there was weekly PE lessons that at least kept me fit to some extent.

Poly life now the only physical thing I do is climb mountain everyday from bus stop all the way up to School of Engineering. >.<

But the fact of the matter is, NS is coming whether I like it or not. Whining about it is fine, but it’s not gonna stop me from going. I ought to do something about it. Also Bryce is choosing that and if we end up in the same class at least I’m not alone.

Also, it does not hurt that I actually seize the day and do something different. I’ve done so many things and found out a lot about myself this year. There’s still room to up up up my confidence to try out new things.

Sigh, I need to pick one…

-___-